Another terrible day, today. Was feeling sad, uneasy, tired and disappointed.

Saw H in school but couldn’t bring myself up to talk to her. During oral comm lesson, she was online. She apologizes for yesterday. But it wasn’t all her fault. I think yesterday was mainly my fault. I shouldn’t get angry for that. It was just a small thing; I don’t even know why I get angry for. They were just talking, chit-chatting. Afterall, they still did their work. Why am I bothered to get myself angry over this? I seriously don’t understand.

A told me that like what O said is either everybody’s fault or nobody’s fault. I choose nobody’s fault BUT my fault. I shouldn’t post that post yesterday. I shouldn’t get angry over that matter. I should have control myself more. I must learn to control myself not to get angry too easily. I must control my temper.

Didn’t talk to H for the whole day today. Wanted to. But there was something holding me back. I just couldn’t bring myself to talk to her. Not that I am still angry with her. Really!!! I am no longer angry with her. No more. I am not angry with anybody EXCEPT….. me. I wanted to talk to her… but it was difficult. T.T

Finally spoke the first word today to H when I was about to leave school with A. I said Bye to her, she smiled back. I turned back immediately. I was too embarrassed to face her. I don’t have the guts and the face to face her.

While walking to the MRT station with A, she told me that H was asking her if I was angry with her, how come I didn’t talk to her today. I told A, that I was not angry with her. It just that… haix.

P.S. I am seriously not angry with you le. I don’t know how to start talking to you. There is something holding me back from talking to you. (hardly talk to the others as well) Please understand that I wanted to talk to you, but…
Plus, please give me some time… thanks, I will really appreciate it.